MADE FOR THE BIG BATHERS
THE 411
Let your f*cks dissolve down the drain. If anyone knocks, fake cry until they back away slowly.
THE VIBE
Everything’s gone to sh*t. The house looks like it was robbed by raccoons. You’ve eaten cereal for three dinners straight. You just yelled “COME AT ME BRO!” at a pile of unfolded laundry. And you’ve strongly considered just… disappearing. Like, fully. New name, new town, no forwarding address. Basically, you’ve run out of patience, time, energy and clean underwear. Enter this meltdown-management soak. It won’t pay your overdue taxes, but it will wrap your fried little soul in a citrus-scented cloak of not my f*cking problem.
THE AFFIRMATION
I give exactly zero fucks, and honestly, it feels quite spiritual.
THE BLEND
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Bergamot – Your anxiety’s arch nemesis
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Orange – Sweetly slaps your brain awake
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Frankincense - Sets the mood for mental peace.
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Magnesium - Relaxes tired muscles and replenishes the stuff your body loses when you're emotionally fried
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Coconut Oil - Leaves your skin soft, smooth, and seriously strokable
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Salts - A triple threat of sea salt, epsom, and himalayan pink for trace minerals and soaking away your sins (plus your stress)
- Vegan. Cruelty free. Handcrafted in Australia.
THE RITUAL
- Run the water.
- Pour the salts.
- Become one with the citrus-scented void where f*cks no longer exist.
100% HAPPINESS GUARANTEE
Not obsessed? We’ll refund you or sort out an exchange. No questions asked.
